• Jeff Butorac

3 Lessons That Helped to Silence my Inner Rival

Updated: Feb 8

As you progress through life, you hope that you pick up some lessons along the way that help to guide and shape what you do and what you think. I am no different. I want to share with you three lessons that I have learned through my years of failure, success, battling my Inner Rival, and learning to silence it. These are lessons that I believe should be able to help anyone whether it’s in sports, business, performance, or life.




1- Life’s not fair- Once I fully realized and internalized the fact that life truly isn’t fair, nor will it ever be, did I learn to not worry about what others have that I don’t. One of the ways learning this lesson really changed my life is I had the realization that I have actually benefitted from life not being fair, as has everyone in life at one point or another.


So often people only care to notice the unfairness of life when it goes against them. They don’t happen to notice it when it goes in their favor.


The sooner you can understand that life isn’t fair, it never will be, and worrying about it won’t change anything, the stronger you will become mentally at being able to overcome adversity.


2- You can choose your mindset- What you think about is actually your choice. Whether you sit and dwell on all the negative things that may be going on in your life, or if you think about the positives and ways to improve your life, what you choose to think about is up to you. Most people don’t realize this. They are controlled by their thoughts and let them roam free to terrorize their mental state.


My life changed when I realized I get to choose what I think about and what I don’t. I have the choice to focus on negatives in situations or positive and productive thoughts that will have a benefit to my life.


3- Expect adversity- It’s great when everything goes smoothly. When you make a plan and it goes exactly the way you had hoped. The thing is, very rarely is that ever the case. Usually there is some type of adversity whether it be big or small, that you have to deal with along the way.


What made a difference for me is how my mindset was going into things. I used to go in expecting them to go exactly the way I planned, and then got frustrated when it didn’t.

Instead, go in with the hopes that everything runs smoothly, but understanding and expecting that there will be some type of adversity you will have to deal with that was unexpected.


By understanding that there is a chance it will not run as expected, you are less likely to be thrown off by adversity if you must face it. Or, if everything does go according to plan, you can breathe easy!


By taking these 3 lessons into account daily, I find that my Inner Rival doesn’t show up as often, and when it does, it doesn’t have nearly as much power as it used to.


I hope these lessons help you to silence your Inner Rival as much as they did for me!

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